08.17.2004

distraction for dummies

I've decided I need a hobby. Maybe a couple hobbies. Something mentally engrossing, to thoroughly divert me from my troubles, like nuclear science, or brain surgery. But interesting to me personally, so not nuclear science or brain surgery. I was thinking about taking up heroin, but I do not like needles, and ideally I would like to have some sort of output from this hobby that I find appealing, so that rules out cross-stitch, as well. I need something to do with my hands, besides slapping people, no matter how much they are begging for it. Moreover, my head will wander where it ought not if left idle, it will follow my foolish heart into murky depths neither knows how to navigate, only to be stuck in the mire, very likely dragging others along to their doom. And so, I need a hobby.

Like this, perhaps.

11:47 PM | Comments (5)

08.09.2004

more songs about buildings and food

Did you know cream soda (at least A&W's) contains caffeine? I didn't, which explains why I was wide fucking awake feeling like I was having a heart attack at 3am after consuming one with my Sunday dinner. Me and caffeine have an uneasy relationship, not unlike the one I have with love. Limited quantities, only when in dire need...that sort of thing. Having been burned many times before, I try to stay away. Now I feel so deceived, and the taint is all over the six-pack in my fridge. And why does cream soda need caffeine anyway? Creamy vanilla-y things should be soothing and sensual, they should not enduce anxiety and manic behavior. Goddammit, I have love for that!

Having had an annoying cough since I started smoking crack for weeks now, today I auditioned a new doctor to get it checked out. What makes this noteworthy is that before checking my vitals or even telling me her name, the nurse handed me a pamphlet -- given to all new patients, she explained -- on the benefits of having a living will. This seemed rather morbid and not terribly confidence-inspiring. Like, "You may not make it through this office visit alive, and by the way, my name is June." It did, however, give me something to clutch like a security blanket during the examination. Poke me, prod me, do what you will, I'm armed with information! In the end, the doctor concluded that I probably have bronchitis, which is not life-threatening, but later, I'll be struck down dead by the fiery wrath of God, and not just for mocking this informative pamphlet.

11:16 PM | Comments (2)

08.04.2004

2 more unrelated things

  1. I am having a sudden and very intense craving for a cream soda right now. Mmm...vanilla-y.
  2. I absolutely suck at being in love.

11:51 AM | Comments (2)

08.02.2004

2 things, unrelated

  1. Sometimes the notion of spending the rest of my life alone, sans man, is very, very appealing.
  2. This is cool as hell.

9:34 AM | Comments (3)