04.28.2003

karma chameleon

(Note: Previously there was a whole boring paragraph here about technical crap, but no more. From now on, all the boring paragraphs on tallulahville.com will be about my life, not technical crap. That's my promise to you -- because I care.)

The weekend was interesting, at least from about 9pm Friday to around noon Saturday while the karma police struggled to keep up with my rapid shifts from good to evil and back again. I tried to tally it all up with plusses and minuses and came up right around zero - typical overall score for most mortals I'm sure but we're striving for better than that here...or maybe worse...at any rate it's this whole neutral/middle area that never interests me. Sometimes I wonder if my prayers go unanswered simply because I'm never sure if I'm praying to God or Satan and they can't tell either.

2:24 PM | Comments (0)


04.25.2003

liberate THIS

Last night I dreamt that the Statue of Liberty had been made detachable and portable and was being schlepped around from town to town in an old flat-bed pickup. Said pickup was behind me and a friend as we drove along and I commented on how much smaller the Statue was than I had imagined it, and in real life I did find it disappointingly small, so perhaps Ms. Liberty could benefit from some of the spam I've been getting, or perhaps I've created a whole new sleazy come-on here: "Liberate the monument, baby. (And sorry it's so disappointingly small.)"

I also dreamt that I had moved into a new-to-me-but-actually-older apartment and quickly realized that the place was falling apart. Dripping ceiling, leaky toilet, flooded bathroom, and best of all, the rat I discovered in the bedroom closet, and for the life of me I couldn't find the phone number for maintenance, just a bunch of old Monkees memorabilia, and I couldn't see how that was going to help me. Shortly afterwards, I dreamt that I was telling somebody about this dream, and it wasn't you, here.

8:33 AM | Comments (0)


04.24.2003

anyone? anyone?

I redesign. I promote. I provide convenient mailto: links. And yet still my inbox is replete with nothing but spammity-spam. Bit discouraging. Where is the love, people? Although I am very excited and relieved to know that my penis size will no longer disappoint if I just "click here".

6:20 PM | Comments (0)


04.23.2003

it's not just a job, it's an...actually it IS just a job.

Today is Secretary's Administrative Assistant's Underpaid Lackey's Administrative Professional's Day. I know this because the people I work with seem to think I am one and therefore gave me not just 1 bouquet of flowers, but 2...because I am twice as wonderful, or have 2 bosses, or have 2 personalities (although they've only met 1), or am doubly-pathetic...I don't know/care. I like flowers. Flowers are pretty. They smell nice and I like getting them from boys. I hate this day, though, and the way it reminds me how my job is so nice but so wrong for me, how I'm both underpaid and a lackey, how I hate being lumped in with this group, as full of fine people as it is, and how a bunch of flowers doesn't make me feel any better about any of this.

On the other hand, I got flowers today, and you (probably) didn't.

4:51 PM | Comments (0)


04.22.2003

no title & no point

This website is like Seinfeld - it's about nothing. Unlike Seinfeld, however, I rarely find it amusing or insightful.

6:22 PM | Comments (0)


04.21.2003

new dog, old tricks

Pretty new redesign, 5 days later, and I'm back to hating writing for this site again. Every time, I realize that what I'd like to share with everyone I know and complete strangers is pretty limited, so I sanitize the life out of my entries, and/or -- and this happens whenever I write, in any medium -- I start to feel so pretentious and self-involved that I become too disgusted with myself and my writing to continue. I really need to get over this somehow.

12:51 AM | Comments (0)


04.17.2003

the language of love (or something like it)

I made up a new word today: bastardly -- something dastardly done by a bastard. Sample usage: "His bastardly behavior often got him laid, but not loved." Maybe I should submit this to pseudodictionary.com along with the other words I made up way back in 2000. Creating and promoting my own language fits nicely into my plans for world domination.

11:01 PM | Comments (0)


commitmentphobia

Blogger Pro, I've been checking you out and you look so very fine, but I don't know if I can commit to you. How do I know you won't disappear on me again like you did this week, right when I was finally ready to tell you I wanted us to be together? You know how important reliability is to me. And this thing with Google -- sure, I love Google too, and I understand you wanting to pursue this thing, but what if you choose Google over me and I'm left in the dust? Still, I've looked at others, and no one else seems right for me. You've got all I want, baby, but I'm scared.

OK, OK, I'll take the plunge with you. Just don't fuck me over please, I can't take another heartbreak.

9:57 PM | Comments (0)


satan compels me...with cheese

I gotta give a shout out to Devil with Cheese, because they gave one to me, because I gave one to them, because it's this whole reciprocal thing which is so rare and beautiful in life, and because it's good karma. Also because they kick ass and are playing at House of Bricks this Sunday, and while I can't be there, you can and should be.

6:53 PM | Comments (0)


haiku! (gesundheit.)

I am so jealous that I didn't think of this idea first. This girl really is my new hero, after April of course because I already told her she was my hero today, and after all the other people in my life going around looking all human when really they should be worshipped as gods.

5:45 PM | Comments (0)


04.16.2003

so new it's new

Behold the redesign, begat of sudden inspiration and several sleepless hours of work yesterday and today. Keep in mind the time logged wasn't so much due to degree of difficulty as degree of stupidity (mine), so it's really not all that impressive. Still, revel in the newness, my babies. It needs some work yet, but don't we all. Except you, perhaps -- you're perfect.

3:56 PM | Comments (0)


04.09.2003

tallulah does not promote tooth decay

Someday I will redesign this website. Really. It just won't be today...

I've decided that what I need is better PR. I myself am perfectly wonderful as-is, I simply suffer from poor marketing. I have a chocolate kind of rep (delicious but bad for you) when it should be strawberry (delicious but GOOD for you!). Unless you happen to hate or be allergic to strawberries, in which case I'm still screwed.

7:17 PM | Comments (1)