now comes the part where I really don't tell you anything.

for instance:

• my real name isn't Tallulah.  either you know it already or I'm not telling you.
• I was born in august,1970.  that means I was conceived circa december '69.  that's right, baby...december.
• I've been around.  not lately, however.
• I have a lot of friends but only one or two of them have websites I know about, so you'll just have to take my word for it.

you could be my new best friend or love of my life!   try this:

• buy me stuff I really don't need and am not even completely sure I want.
• have an offbeat sense of humor.
• accept that I will always be late.  it's just easier that way.
• take me to the beach.  I'm not real picky about which one so long as there's an ocean attached.
• and/or, take me to the city, but don't make me drive 'cuz that crazy big city traffic freaks me out.
• have a brain and use it occasionally.  just don't be a snot about it, you arrogant asshole.
• always play nice.  please and thank you.

and also:

• I'd rather be hot than cold.
• I don't have a favorite color. I do seem to like orange and turquoise a lot, however.
• my bizarre and explicitly-detailed dreams are the stuff of legend and future case studies.
• I am a pathetic underachiever, yet somehow I still manage to intimidate some people.  how is this possible?
• I write songs, a few of which I don't hate.  if you've heard them, I must like you or something. 
• I watch too much tv.
• you should really go home, because I can't think of anything else to say here right now.

(and lest you forget, it's © 2003 by me and so shall it ever be.)